SAN ANTONIO – A recent risque report compiled a list of cities that are best for gardening while naked, and while San Antonio didn’t even crack the top 50, it did move up 16 places from a couple of years ago.
LawnStarter ranked the 200 biggest cities in the U.S. ahead of World Naked Gardening Day on Saturday, May 6, and San Antonio came in at No. 78 — up from 94th place in 2021.
Recommended Videos
While San Antonio didn’t rank too high, Austin and Houston made the top 10 list of great cities to plant without pants, coming in at No. 2 and No. 9, respectively.
The company, which matches people with qualified lawn care providers, used metrics like nudist population size, indecent exposure laws, gardener-friendliness (how on Earth is this measured), weather forecasts, access to waxing salons, and sex offender listings -- among 12 total metrics.
Tessa West, an associate professor at the Department of Psychology at New York University, said the benefits of gardening naked include “an increase in vitamin D, learning to feel comfortable in your skin, and exploring new physical sensations.”
“Dangers include sunburn, accidental injury if you’re not careful (hint: don’t sit down in the dirt!), and bug bites where you don’t want them,” said West.
She suggested wearing sunscreen — everywhere — if you choose to participate in the naked gardening trend.
“Remember, some of these body parts have never seen the sun, so they are very vulnerable. This is true for all skin tones and races,” said West.
Leslie Gielow Jacobs, professor of law at the University of the Pacific, said the U.S. Constitution permits states and cities to restrict public nudity so long as it is only a form of conduct, not a form of speech.
For what it’s worth -- public nudity is illegal in San Antonio. The law specifically includes the bare butt, male and female genitals and women’s breasts as being illegal to show in public.
Conversely, an article from the Austin American Statesman notes that Austin doesn’t have public nudity laws.
No matter what you wear to water your plants, just make sure you’re being safe.
While you’re here: You can get up to $400 in free plants from SAWS as part of WaterSaver Program.